Part 12: Obedient Hearts “The Many Faces of the Perpetrator”




I’ve noticed so many different responses when disciplining my children.  When you have fourteen kids of course, you see quite a wide spectrum of personality types.  And they all have their portfolios of interesting behaviors and idiosyncrasies.  Here are some “faces” of little people that I’ve encountered in the process of trying to teach fourteen very different individuals to obey.
The Pleaser: He very seldom needs spanking, usually complies with what is expected of him.
The Limit Pusher: He seems compelled to see how much he can get away with.  Then he wonders, “Why do I get all the spankings?
The Prophet: He’s Elijah, calling down fire from heaven and then ordering all the priests of Baal executed.  He sees in black and white.  He’s quick to see sin in others, not so quick to see it in himself, but once he does see it he’s as hard on himself as he is on others.  He may even bring you the switch and tells you that he needs a spanking.
The Manipulator: He tries to make his parents feel guilty-“You don’t love me!” He’s the type who will have his friend come to ask you if they can do something together, figuring that you’re more likely to give consent to someone outside the family.  This guy will often come demanding on the spot decisions, hoping you’ll make a decision without time to consider all the angles.
The Steady, Stable Type: He takes the correction and makes changes in his behavior.  Gotta love this kid.
The Pouter: May be confused with the manipulator.  He needs time to work through his emotions.  You may need to send him to his room for a time to get his feelings under control.  He can come back out when he has his attitude adjusted.
The Sobber: He has a sensitive spirit and takes correction very seriously.  He may be heartbroken over having disappointed Mommy and need lots of hugs and affirmation after discipline.
The Hardnose: My hardnose actually had a soft, mushy interior inside his hard shell.  He tried not to cry because he was embarrassed.  Be careful not to let this guy fool you.  You may be harsh where gentleness is the real need.
The Forgetter: He’s generally cheerful and laid back.   “I forgot” is his standard excuse.  He needs motivation to remember that he can remember what’s really important.
The Wiggle Worm: He tries to wiggle out of punishment:  “I love you Mommy. I won’t ever do that again.”  He needs to be pinned down to accept responsibility for his actions.
The Screamer: He tries to generate enough volume during a spanking to make you think you’re killing him so that you’ll ease up.  He recovers with surprising quickness.
The Repenter: Once corrected, he’s looking to please.  He’ll be extra good to make up for it his recent misdemeanors..
I’m probably forgetting some other colorful characters, but these are some of the ones who have made an appearance from time to time in the Boyer household.
How many of them have you seen at your house?
~ Marilyn

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About Marilyn

Marilyn is wife to Rick, Mom to 14 children, Nana to 22 grandchildren (and counting!) and homeschooler for 37 years. She and her husband own Character Concepts which they started for the purpose of helping others raise children with a strong, godly character and Biblical worldview.They have developed character curriculum from preschool through high school, based on what they found worked when teaching their own 14 children over the years. Her passion is to help young moms raise kids of character and enjoy the journey!

2 Replies to “Part 12: Obedient Hearts “The Many Faces of the Perpetrator””

  1. That’s the nice thing about babies. Even babies can give us migraines from time to time, but mostly they’re just fun to cuddle. Trust me, even when you have 14 they’re all different personalities!

  2. Bar none, my 4 yr old is mostly a limit pusher, and a little hardnose thrown in there. My almost 8 yr old is a little different. She is a mix between prophet (or ‘little mommy’ as I call her) and screamer. The screamer part was a little difficult as once when we lived in an apartment, we had the cops called on us! Makes for an interesting household, and I can say with each child we have the Lord raises the standards in US so we can effectively parent and grow ourselves!! Can’t wait to see the personality com out in our new little guy, but so far he is all sugar sweet 😀

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